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Resistance (part 4 cont.)

The complement part of this is the resistance to action. Action is a prime part of growth. If we don't do any actions to achieve our goal, then how are we going to achieve our goal?

The problem comes with us living totally in our mind. We think about it. We contemplate what we are going to do. We are not saying that we should leave the mind behind and just totally jump into action. Some contemplation may be necessary. The unfortunate thing is that we remain in the contemplation stage and never venture onto the doing stage.

The other point is, that when we are venturing into unknown territory, we have really no idea what it is going to be like. We have never experienced this before. It is a totally new experience. The mind will choke on this fact. Fear. How can we possibly use the known experiences of the past to give us confidence to proceed into the unknown. It is like a brick wall suddenly materialises and bars us from movement. The longer we contemplate the resistance, the less chance we have to break through. The brick wall is once again fear. And we often feel it as such. We get hooked into the fearfulness of doing the action, we are at level one again.

We can experience this resistance to change by the inability to let go of an old way of dealing with something. No matter how much we want to, we just can't let go. It is like we are standing on the edge of a precipice looking over - will we be able to fly or not. Fear of the unknown. We operate in a certain way for so long that it is known. I know that if I act this way, this will happen. It is known - or so we think. Even if it means suffering, we choose the known path because it seems much easier. So if we are guilt bound and chose to let go of the guilty feeling (thoughts), what is left? We don't know. We have never tried it before. There is a hole in the game plan.

What comes in to fill that gap? It is a shock. Aren't we supposed to be feeling "bad" right now, and be racked with guilt thoughts and the inner critic for a couple of days ( at least a couple of days if I am going to get value for money)? Staying in the cycle, we know that we are not growing and are suffering, certainly - but it is known. Now, we decide to let go of the cycle and give what we really need to our self. What is left? There is resistance to stopping playing the game. It is the same with letting go of the other "bad" feelings. We get this eerie feeling that something is not right. Aren't we supposed to feel "bad" at this point? Aren't we supposed to be ripping ourselves into strips with the inner critic?

The point is that we have done this time-and-time again. When we are guilty, this happens, then this happens, then this and then the cycle is finished. Usually, in the middle, we get into the "I'm a terrible person" as well, so we have all of this. It is the same every time.

The way we go through guilt (as an example) is exactly the same every time. We have our guilt thoughts saved up for the event, we have our "I'm a terrible person" outlook saved up for the event - the whole box and dice. It is the same every time. So if we let go of the guilt, at say a third of the way through the suffering, there is a whole 2/3 of the process waiting to jump in and have it's go. We sit back and say, but wait - aren't I supposed to get onto the "I'm a terrible person" part now. The cycle is cut and a huge fear rushes in. We stand on the precipice of the unknown. We are launched head first into the reality of being here right now, because we are no longer in the middle of a veil of rolling cycles.

Most of us roll in cycles. We go from our anger cycle to our guilt cycle to our anxiety cycle to our fear cycle to our worry cycle to our depression cycle and then it all starts again.

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