Self-Help Practice 6:
Create a Tape of Extended Obsessions
What to do During Obsessing
So, Worry Time is the first structured practice and the loop
tape is the second structured practice for worries. Here's the third.
If your worries come in the form as an extended
story, with details of all the catastrophic outcomes, you can also practice using
a tape recording of your detailed obsessions. This time, however, the recording will be
longer, describing all of your fears.
Here's how to do it. Write out a detailed story
of the feared event in the following way: Imagine you're in the middle of a spontaneous
obsession. Just put yourself in that place. Write a moment-by-moment description of the
exact words and pictures that come into your mind. And right it in the present tense.
"I'm now standing in front of my house and I can see that the door is open."
Like that. Give as many details as possible about the setting, your actions, the response
of others, and especially what you're feeling. Because that's what we're going to go
toward, your emotional response to the story.
Now, read your story several times, rehearse it, and then
record
your story on an audio tape with as much drama as you can. Put the emotion in
your words because you've got to listen to it repeatedly, and each time you listen you are
going to try to become as distressed as possible. So you want the drama of the event to
come through in your voice.
Each day listen repeatedly to this tape for forty-five
minutes. As you listen to the tape, imagine that the story is actually
happening, and let yourself experience the distress inside you
that the story evokes. The more you are in touch with your feelings while you listen, the
more benefits you will gain from your practice.
Continue daily practice, focusing on one
specific worry or obsession, until you no longer feel
highly distressed. If you follow these directions in your practice, you
should notice that your distress is gradually lowering within five to seven days.
Then make new tapes about other
worries or obsessions that bother you, and follow the same process again. As with
the loop tape, your progress will be slower if you allow your mind to wander while you
listen.
If you are not noticing improvement, make sure you are doing
all you can to respond to the recorded story as intensely as you would to an actual
obsession.
Let me give you a sample form our book
Stop Obsessing! of what such a script might
sound like. Here's a woman who is a washer and feels contaminated by her mother.
"I'm sitting here in the chair, the door opens and my
mother comes in. She enters the room. She sees me and she says, 'I'm glad to see you. It's
been a long time.' She comes to me and she touches me. She wants to hug me. My mother is
astonished that I let her hug me and she says, 'I can't believe that I'm allowed to hug my
daughter again!' Now I feel the contamination spreading all over me. I can feel her hands
on my back and I begin to feel that it's never going to go away...can never be washed off.
I would like my mother to leave and I want to take a shower, a bath, so I can get clean
again. I can't say anything. I can't move. I'm overwhelmed by the feeling of being
contaminated. My mother is standing beside me and she's holding my hand, and I can feel
how she becomes even more contaminating.
I would like her to take her hand off of me.
She's asking me, 'Are you afraid of me?' I would like to explain to her just how afraid I
am of her, but I don't say anything. I just let her hold my hand and then it goes on, so
at the end I feel trapped. She'll never go away, she'll go on contaminating me forever,
more and more contamination. I'll never feel free again. I have the urge to leave the room
and forget everything about my mother, but her touch is everywhere on my body.'"
That's the kind of drama that you should put in your voice.
And that's the kind of moment-by-moment detail needed.
Now we've covered two ways to handle obsessions in the
moment: postponing and changing the ways you obsess. And we've reviewed three structured
practices: Daily Worry Time, a short loop-tape and an audio-tape of your extended
obsession.
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