For myself and those millions of others who live with the "Doubting
Disease", as Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) is sometimes called the
answer is, yes. For us doubt can be pathological.
There is a need for certainty in OCD. Certainty is, of course, elusive. It
is in this not knowing that compulsive ritual is born.
The disorder asks, "What if?". The question comes unbidden. In
answering that question we are lost. We are lost in a labyrinth of increasing
anxiety unable to break free. Fear, horrific images, vivid terrifying
consequences consume us. "What if?" is the obsession.
If only we could know for sure that these terrors will not come to pass. But
we can not know. There is something fundamentally wrong with that process in
us. The disorder is unable to tolerate uncertainty. In the absence of certainty
we seek relief. We seek anything that will stop this searing anxiety. One whose
fears are centered around contamination will begin to wash or decontaminate.
Another will check to make sure they have done something or not done something
and on it goes. Soon the behavior becomes ritualized. It has to be done a
certain way and a certain number of times. It evolves becoming more and more
complicated until it takes over the persons life.
OCD afflicts 2%-3% of any given population . It does not discriminate,
geographically or ethnically. It is found across the whole spectrum of human
culture and population. Many of these millions of sufferers do not know what is
wrong with them. They do know that something is wrong. They know that these
strange demands are irrational but cannot stop. They do not know that they are
not alone.
This page is just by one of those people.
If this page helps anyone, either to find help or just to discover they are
not alone, then it's purpose will have been then defined. I am just attempting
to carry the message.