Warning Signs
of an Abusive Personality

A PUSH FOR QUICK INVOLVEMENT

Comes on very strong, claiming, "I've never felt loved like this by anyone". An abuser pressures the victim for an exclusive commitment almost immediately.

JEALOUSY

Excessively possessive; calls constantly or visits unexpectedly. Prevents you from going to work because "you might meet someone". Checks the mileage on your car.

UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS

Expects you to be perfect and meet their every need.

ISOLATION

Tries to cut you off from family and friends. Accuses people who are your supporters of "causing trouble". The abuser may deprive you from holding a job.

HYPERSENSITIVITY

Is easily insulted, claiming that their feelings are hurt when they are really mad. They'll rant about the injustice of things that are just part of life.

THREATS OF VIOLENCE

Makes statements like, "I'll break your neck" or "I'll kill you," and then dismisses them with "Everybody talks that way" or "I didn't really mean it".

CRUELTY TO ANIMALS AND TO CHILDREN

Kills or punishes animals brutally. Also may expect children to do things that are far beyond their ability. Sixty-five percent of abusers who beat their partner will also abuse children.

VERBAL ABUSE

Constantly criticizes you, or says blatantly cruel, hurtful things. Degrades, curses, calls you ugly names.

RIGID SEX ROLES

Expects you to serve, obey and remain at home.

SUDDEN MOOD SWINGS

Switches from sweetly loving to explosively violent in a matter of minutes.

PAST BATTERING

Admits hitting in the past, but says they made them do it or the situation brought it on.

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